


Uraraka's Moving Castle

by cowboys_in_space



Category: Howl Series - Diana Wynne Jones, Howl's Moving Castle - All Media Types, 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia
Genre: Alternate Universe - Howl's Moving Castle Fusion, Bakugou makes the BEST OLD MAN, F/M, Fantasy, Slow Burn, The reasons to make this?, Uraraka can float, and Bakugou as a crotchety old man is my life
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-23
Updated: 2019-04-05
Packaged: 2019-10-15 06:17:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,326
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17523473
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cowboys_in_space/pseuds/cowboys_in_space
Summary: In the land of Ingary, where such things as seven-league boots and cloaks of invisibility really exist, being an only child is a combination of confusing and infuriating.Bakugou Katsuki was an only child and tended to see the situation as more infuriating than confusing.When his life is derailed by the Witch Uraraka and a curse from the Witch of the Waste, Katsuki finds that he has no idea what fate will bring him. Apparently, it has something to do with Uraraka.Basically, the Howl's Moving Castle AU that I haven't gotten out of my head!





	1. In Which Bakugou Yells at a Hat

Looking back, Bakugou Katsuki was pretty sure that he could blame one letter from Tsuyu for LITERALLY EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENED FOR THE REST OF HIS LIFE. To understand why he felt justified in this assessment, you must first understand his life up until that point.

In the land of Ingary, where such things as seven-league boots and cloaks of invisibility really exist, being an only child is a combination of confusing and infuriating. In most cases, the eldest will fail first and worst, and the youngest will be met with success whenever they try to seek their fortune. An only child doesn’t seem to abide by any such laws, and as such, it’s just about impossible to know what will happen when they finally leave home.

Katsuki was an only child and tended to see the situation as more infuriating than confusing.

See, his parents owned a hat shop. And Katsuki? He was a natural at everything he tried. In school, the only people even close to his level were Yaoyorozu Momo and Todoroki Shouto, who clearly had more advantages in life than Katsuki did since they were both filthy stinking rich, so it wasn’t like they counted. He was excellent at any sport he tried, he was the best cook around, and he just happened to be a prodigy at making hats. 

This meant that the old hag who called herself his mother wanted to keep him around as much as she possibly could; his hats were the best hats in Market Chipping, and she knew it. Luckly, “as long as she possibly could” was only about a year away. He’d be eighteen soon, and no one could legally stop him from signing up with the army and seeking his fortune.

Katsuki could never even bring himself to slack off at the hat shop, no matter how much he wished he could be literally anywhere else. He had tried to once. He made a grand total of one bad hat, set it on fire to hide the evidence and knew that he was never going to be a slacker. 

He somehow ended up working longer and longer hours at the shop, not going out too much. He knew it was because there wasn’t much to interest him in Market Chipping; it was tiny and he’d already done everything there was to do. Still, he kept getting letters from Tsuyu yelling at him to actually come out and visit her. He decided to worry about that later. Tsuyu’s bluntness could rival Katsuki’s temper, and she would inevitably chew him out for ignoring her letters this long. There was no way that particular conversation could end well. It was best to put it off.

Katsuki didn’t have much to do during business hours; after ONE TIME Katsuki attempted to forcibly shove a hat on a FRANKLY INSUFFERABLE customer's head, his parents had expressly forbidden him from talking to customers, EVER, and stuck him in the back room to sew. So he ended up sitting there, quietly bristling and wishing that there was anything that he could do to stop himself from hearing the gossip from the shop part. Unfortunately, he didn’t know any magic and his parents were against buying spells unless it was necessary. Most of the time, all he heard was boring gossip that he honestly couldn’t care less about, but occasionally, he’d hear people talk about the castle.

Well, at least that was what people called it. It didn’t look much like a castle, and it didn’t act much like one, either. It was huge, made of all sorts of different house pieces thrown together every which way with little regard for physics or even a proper sense of balance, and far too many chimneys to count. Oh, and it moved. It walked around on chicken legs, as though that were the sort of behavior any castle were supposed to have.

“Apparently, a witch lives there!” someone said one day, in an overly-excited whisper that was honestly loud enough to be a scream. Duh. Everyone knew that it was Uraraka’s moving castle. It wasn’t exactly a mystery. Katsuki tried hard not to listen as he sewed a golden silk flower onto a hat.

“The Witch of the Waste?” someone asked. Idiot. Katsuki stabbed his needle at one of the cloth petals with more force than necessary. 

“No, a different one, I think,” the first person replied.

“I heard it was the Witch Uraraka,” another person said. Finally.

“Great, just what we need,” the second person griped, “another witch on the edge of town.”

Oh yeah, because people had started obsessing over the Witch of the Waste again. Honestly, Katsuki wasn’t entirely sure why. She had been kicking around for who knows how long, and if she hadn’t been a threat in twenty years, he wasn’t sure why she was suddenly a threat again. Something about All for One. He was pretty sure that no one would care if Market Chipping weren’t right on the edge of the Waste. 

Anyways, she wasn’t the interesting witch. No, that was Uraraka. No one knew anything concrete about her. Some people said that she stole people’s magic, like the Witch of the Waste. Others said that she didn’t have to, because she had an army of demons at her beck and call. Yet others said that she was just so powerful in her own right, she could sustain the castle by herself. People couldn’t even decide if she was good or evil, had a heart of gold or no heart at all, so honestly, Katsuki was done with hearing about witches in general.

Katsuki held up the hat that he was working on. It was bright red, with gold lining and a rather attractive golden-silk flower. He couldn’t imagine anyone wearing it. “Honestly, whoever buys you better not be a gossip,” he threatened the hat. “They’d better have a good head on their shoulders, and have better things to talk about. Like, I don’t know, maybe the  _ war  _ that’s about to start with  _ All for One? _ In what universe are witches more exciting to talk about than a full-on war? I swear to god, if one more person mentions how close the castle has wandered, I’m going to lose it.”

Later that day, a young woman looked out the window and said that she could almost count the chimneys on the castle. Katsuki yelled across the shop for her to shut up and die, and heard her scurry out the door. He gave the hat a significant look.

Days bled together in the Market Chipping, and Katsuki had no intention of trying to keep track of them. That was, until he got THE letter from Tsuyu stating that the next day was Mayday, and that she knew he had off work, so that if he didn’t come visit her at the bakery she would make sure that he regretted it.  Katsuki was certain that she would find a way to torment him if he didn’t visit, so he resigned himself to the inevitable.

And just like that, everything began.

The next day, Katsuki had a quick breakfast, grabbed his hat and headed for the door. His mom, the intrusive hag that she was, immediately honed in on that.

“Oh, you’re actually going out today, Katsuki?” she asked, the hint of a jeer in her voice.

“NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS, WOMAN!” Katsuki shouted back. “I WOULD BE OUT ALL THE TIME IF YOU LET ME SIGN ON WITH THE ARMY!”

“We are NOT having this conversation again,” his mom said, crossing her arms. “You know that I don’t think that you should, even when you ARE of age.”

“Because you don’t believe in me.”

“BECAUSE I don’t think young people should be allowed to make choices that difficult!”

“C-could you both…” his dad started, but drifted off when both Katsuki and his mom fixed their glares on him.

“SPEAK UP,” they shouted in unison. Katsuki’s dad shrunk in on himself a bit more.

Katsuki rolled his eyes. “I’m going to Asui’s Bakery,” he said, shoving his hat on his head and making for the door again.

The overly-enthusiastic parades and festivities of Mayday came off as disingenuous every single year. Everyone roaming the streets in their best clothes, dancing, partying, singing, flitting in and out of shops, getting their face painted -- it all seemed forced. Like they were celebrating just for the sake of celebrating, which served no purpose for anyone. This year’s Mayday was flat-out disrespectful, what with them being on the cusp of war. Yet Katsuki seemed to be alone in his vision of the world, for everyone else in town was participating with a jubilance verging on manic.

The worst part of it all was that the hat shop was right by the center of town, making it impossible for Katsuki to just catch the edges of the commotion. He was thrust right into the center of everything. 

A woman dressed in a ridiculous amount of silk and furs ran into him at a high velocity, sending him off kilter. 

“Sorry!” she called, tone airy. She didn’t sound like she meant it.

“OI, WATCH IT!!” he shouted, rounding on her. She had, for whatever reason, painted her skin bright pink and fastened fake horns to her head. The overall picture was ridiculous.

“I said sorry. Jeeze, lighten up.” And with that, she was off, racing into the crowds. Another reason that he didn’t want to be here: the crowds of idiots.

Katsuki started making his way to the bakery, when he spotted a parade of soldiers. They marched in single file, as a band played, keeping their marching in time with the music. Katsuki scoffed and clenched his fists. If he were in the army, he wouldn’t find himself in some stupid parade in  _ Market Chipping. _ He would be off trying to stop All for One. 

It took several minutes for Katsuki to tear himself away from the marching soldiers. He made a decision: he would take the back way to Asui’s. That would at least limit his exposure he had to the worst aspects of Mayday.

He ducked into an alleyway, and started making his way through the twists and turns of the backways of Market Chipping. 

Katsuki passed some pub that he probably wouldn’t have noticed if it weren’t for the fact that there were two men in army uniforms loitering outside, chatting. One of them was broad with a brown mustache, and the other was tall and blonde. Both were too relaxed, Blondie leaning against the wall as he laughed at something Mustache said. Katsuki stared at them and grit his teeth. It was bad enough that there were army people loitering in Market Chipping rather than worrying about the war. These men couldn’t even follow orders well enough to be in the parade like they were supposed to. They had no right to be in the army at all! Especially if someone like Katsuki couldn’t join.

“Hey, kid,” Mustache one said with a leer. “What do you think you’re staring at?”

“Not much,” Katsuki said, leering right back.

Blondie pushed off the wall. “Hey,” he barked, “watch how you talk to your militia. Your life could be in our hands one day.”

“Doubtful,” Katsuki said, “seeing as you’re in Market Chipping, where they would only send the worst of their officers in the first place, and you couldn’t even follow orders to be in a stupid parade correctly. That makes you the worst of the worst. Frankly, if my life were in your hands, I’d rather just die.”

Blondie clenched his fists. “Why you little--”

“Hey,” Mustache said, “calm down.”

“What, you wanna go old man?!” Katsuki goaded. A grin crept across his face. Maybe today would be fun after all.

“Monoma,” Mustache said, warning in his voice.

Blondie laughed. “You really think that you can take a professional? You’re delusional, kid. Get going, or else.”

“Or else what?” Katsuki asked.

“Monoma,” Mustache repeated, a little more desperately.

“Or else I’ll show you just how delusional you are!”

Katsuki opened his mouth, but when he tried to respond, he found that he couldn’t. He felt a hand at his right elbow.

“Ah, there you are, darling,” a female voice said. Katsuki started.  _ Darling?  _ What the fuck? He glared down to see… well, a girl. She was cutesie, too, with short, fluffy brown hair, the roundest face he had ever seen, and pink cheeks. “I’m so sorry, officers! I’ve been looking for him everywhere, he tends to get himself into trouble.” She sent the two men a warm smile. “I hope he didn’t cause too much for the two of you.”

Katsuki tried to protest, but found that he still couldn’t speak. Neither of the men spoke, either.

“Well, we’d best be going,” Round Face said, and walked away. Katsuki walked with her, but only because he didn’t have a choice. She was controlling his body. Of course he was going to get kidnapped by some witch before he could go see Tsuyu. Maybe he had the luck of an oldest child after all.

When they were a few blocks away, he felt a shift. Control was his again. He shoved Round Face off of him and whirled on her. She crossed her arms. “What the fuck was that?!” he screamed. “You can’t use magic to kidnap someone and then not expect consequences when you let them go! What are you, stupid?!”

Round Face sighed deeply. “Apparently, you’re the stupid one. I wouldn’t have done anything if I hadn’t seen that a fight was about to break out, in the middle of the street, where any number of bystanders could get hurt.” She sounded so put upon. “You were clearly the problem, so I removed you from the picture. And since I let you go, it clearly wasn’t kidnaping.” 

She made to leave, but Katsuki grabbed her arm.

“You think that  _ I  _ have a problem?!” he asked. “You have no idea what I was trying to do, you don’t know anything! You just get on your high horse and judge people based on--”

“Wait,” she interrupted. She wasn’t even looking at him. 

“HEY, are you even--”

She grabbed his arm and started pulling. Katsuki stumbled, and thought for a moment that she was trying to fight him after all, but realized that she was dragging him somewhere. He let go of her arm and tugged at her hold, but she only held on tighter.

“The fuck?!” Katsuki cried, stumbling slightly, still resisting.

“Sorry, but it seems like you’re involved,” Round Face said. She shot him a look. “Seems like you should have just walked away when you could have, hm?”

“Oi, watch it!” Katsuki said, but then looked behind him. There seemed to be a mass of goopy black figures following them. He’d heard reports of some like them working for All for One. He fell into step next to Round Face, who was steadily picking up the pace. As much as Katsuki wanted to be with anyone else, it was better to be stuck with her than just fucking die.

Round Face upped the pace to a run, which Katsuki met with ease. He glanced behind them again, to see a tumbling mass of black goop filling the whole alleyway, gaining on them. Katsuki looked forward again, and they were headed straight for a dead end. “Are you trying to get us killed, idiot?!” He screamed.

“Hold on!” Round Face yelled, unbothered. And then, suddenly, they were shooting into the air. Katsuki most certainly  _ didn’t  _ scream, thank you very much. 

Their ascent started to slow, and they were surely going to fall, when Round Face said, “Now, extend your legs,” he hadn’t realized that he had curled them up beneath him, “and start walking.” 

She was insane. Still, there was nothing else Katsuki could do, so he listened. And they didn’t fall. They walked on the air.

“Why didn’t you just do this in the first place?!” Katsuki griped.

“I was hoping that I could lose them without using too much of my magic,” she said, tone irritated. “Just tell me where to drop you off so we can both be out of each other’s hair.”

“Asui’s Bakery,” Katsuki said. “And I can’t wait for that.”

Round face frowned at him. “I probably saved your life twice just then. You know that, right?”

“I wasn’t gonna lose that fight, and I was only in danger because of  _ you _ .”

“You really are infuriating, aren’t you?” she asked. 

“THE FUCK DID YOU JUST SAY ABOUT ME?!” Katsuki wished that he could pull away, but as they were currently walking over the market square, he realized that was impossible. Stupid witches. 

“That’s Asui’s there, right?” she asked, nodding towards a building.

“DON’T IGNORE ME ROUND FACE!” Katsuki shouted. He looked at the building and added, “Yeah, it is.”

“Good.” They started lowering, and Round Face deposited Katsuki gently on the balcony. 

“Well,” Katsuki said, “this sucked.”

“Yeah,” Round Face agreed. “It was awful meeting you.”

And with that, she jumped off the balcony. Katsuki knew that she wouldn’t splat, so he didn’t waste his time worrying. Instead, he charged into the bakery.

The second he opened the door, Katsuki was met with the intoxicating smell of pastries baking and Tsuyu’s little sister staring at him, mouth agape. The baking sheet that she was holding slipped out of her limp hands, clattering to the floor, making her startle. She shook her head hard. 

“Did you just  _ float  _ onto our  _ balcony?!”  _ Littlest Frog asked, still staring at him.

“I don’t see how that’s any of your business,” Katsuki snapped, and she flinched slightly. “Just tell your sister I’m here.”

She nodded and rushed back to the shopfront, away from the kitchens, baking tray left abandoned on the ground.

Tsuyu came out just as Katsuki began to feel impatient. 

When Katsuki first met her when they were six years old, he thought that she had looked like a frog. Now, at seventeen years old, she still looked like a frog. She had huge, bugging eyes, big hands with fingers too long for her palms, a green tint to her hair, and a strangely long tongue that she stuck out whenever she concentrated on anything. 

When they were six and he told her that she looked like a frog, she took it as a compliment. Nowadays, she no longer took this as a compliment, and tended to tell Katsuki that he looked like a serial killer whenever he mentioned her frogginess. 

That was probably why they still worked as friends.

“So, you actually are back here,” she noted, regarding him. She smirked. “Should I assume that what Satsuki told me about you floating onto the balcony with a mysterious, beautiful witch was true, too?”

“ _ Beautiful?!”  _ Katsuki cried. “More like fucking _ evil!” _

Tsuyu’s smirk dropped, and her eyes widened. “Wait, Satsuki didn’t make that up?!” She asked, dumbstruck. Oh, that comment had been a joke. Good. That witch hadn't been fucking beautiful. “Katsuki!” Tsuyu said. “Do you know how dangerous witches can be? If you didn't have such a bad personality, she probably would have eaten your heart!”

“WHAT was that about my personality?!”

“Not the important part! Tell me everything that happened.”

And so Katsuki did. He told her the whole story. Tsuyu didn’t interrupt him, but the longer he talked, the deeper her frown got. Once his story was finished, she said, “Let me get this straight. You tried to fight some soldiers, managed to get yourself entirely in some witch’s mercy, got chased by what looked like minions of  _ All for One himself,  _ and proceeded to rely on said witch to get out of the situation? All in one afternoon? And  _ survived? _ ”

“What, do you think that I’m an idiot?! I can handle some witch!” Katsuki decided to ignore the fact that he’d been entirely at her mercy. “Besides, you’re talking about it like I did it on purpose!” Katsuki glared at Tsuyu, but she didn't flinch. She knew him well enough that she wasn’t afraid of him in the slightest, which was the  _ worst. _

“It may not have been on purpose,” she said, crossing her arms, “but you shouldn’t have messed with those soldiers in the first place.” Her voice got strangely tender when she said, “You’ll get your chance. Soon.”

“Stop worrying about it,” Katsuki complained. “I’m here. I’m alive. None of that other stuff fucking matters, so drop it!”

“Fine,” she said, “but at least promise me that you'll be  _ trying  _ to take care of yourself.”

“Of course I will! What are you trying to get at?”

Tsuyu looked unconvinced. “You’re plan is to rush head-first into danger the moment that you can. If I weren’t worried, I’d be insane.”

“Why are you bringing the army into this?! You think that I can’t take care of myself?!” Katsuki tried his hardest not to yell, but he definitely couldn’t keep the anger out of his voice.

“You know that’s not true,” Tsuyu said.

“Do I?! Because you’re doing a damn good job acting like it is!”

“It’s just-”

“Just what?!”

“It’s just that I can’t come with you.” Tsuyu said it with a tone so matter-of-fact that Katsuki almost forgot how stupid her point was. “I can’t come with you, and it’ll be the first time that we’re apart since we were kids, back when I still thought that I’d join the army, or become a sorcerer, or do anything other than staying here and running the bakery. I don’t want to stop you from living your dreams but I’m  _ worried  _ about when you leave because you’ll change and you’ll grow and you’ll be  _ wonderful,  _ even if you are an ass, and I’ll just be here.” Tsuyu’s voice broke on the last word, and she glared at Katsuki, daring him to call her emotional or stupid.

“Shit,” Katsuki said, staring at Tsuyu. “Stop that,” he said, gesturing to her face, and his tone still sounded aggressive, but she tended to understand when he didn’t mean for it to. “The only reason for you not to join the army, or be a sorcerer, or whatever is because you’re too scared to go for it!” 

“You don’t understand,” she said, rolling her eyes. “You’re not an oldest child.”

“Well, fuck that!” Bakugou said. He grabbed her by both of her shoulders and shook her a little. “Why the fuck would you just give in to a life that you don’t want!? What are you, stupid?!”

She took a deep breath. “I’d rather be stupid than a hothead.” She said it with a smirk.

“I’M NOT THAT HOT-HEADED!!” Katsuki shouted, which made Tsuyu’s smirk soften into a genuine, fond smile. “God, you’re such a stupid little frog!”

“Hey!” Tsuyu protested.

“But that’s not the point! The point is, you should come with me.”

Tsuyu tilted her head to the side and placed her index finger on her chin. “Where would I be going during my shift?”

“Not right NOW. In a few MONTHS. When I join the ARMY. You should come with me. We can enroll together.”

Tsuyu’s eyebrows pulled together. “I can’t,” she said.

“Why the fuck not?! What’s stopping you?!”

“My family,” Tsuyu started, “my siblings, the bakery, the fact that I’m an oldest, but mostly? If we both disappeared together, people would say that we’d eloped, and I honestly could not think of anything worse than that.” She said it like it was common knowledge. Katsuki wondered how she could be this ridiculous.

“What would be so bad about people  _ thinking  _ we’re eloping? It’s not like we’re  _ actually  _ eloping.” Katsuki couldn’t help making a face at that thought. Actually eloping with this idiot frog was not a pleasant thought.

“While that may be true, I’d like my loved ones to know that I have better taste than that.”

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN BETTER TASTE?!” Bakugou shouted, baring his teeth at her.

“That,” Tsuyu said, pointing at his face. “That is exactly what I meant.”

“I’m a FUCKING DELIGHT, and anyone would be LUCKY to elope with me!” Tsuyu laughed at that, making Katsuki fume even more. “WHAT’S SO FUNNY?!”

“Tsuyu!” Tsuyu’s dad shouted from the kitchen portion of the bakery. “Can you help with the jelly cakes?!”

“Can you get Samidare to do it?!” she shouted back. “I’m with Katsuki right now!”

“Good!” her dad replied. “Bakugou can help, too!”

Katsuki and Tsuyu made eye contact. “Sorry,” she said. “You up for being roped into work?”

Katsuki shrugged. “You better make it worth my time.”

“You can have your pick of any one item in the shop.”

“Two,” Katsuki replied, crossing his arms.

Tsuyu crossed her arms right back. “One baked good and a hard candy.”

Katsuki considered it. He honestly liked cooking of any kind, baking included, and baking with Tsuyu was better than baking alone. Plus, this was a pretty good deal. “Fine,” he said. 

Tsuyu smiled and lead the way to the kitchens.


	2. In Which Bakugou isn't Cute

Katsuki had managed to forget about the whole encounter with Round Face the Witch while he was with Tsuyu, but he couldn’t stay with her forever. The day’s festivities dwindled to a close, the sun started to set, and Tsuyu’s father thought it was best for him to get home before it was totally dark. So, as dusk settled in, Katsuki walked home and  _ thought.  _

His first adventure was entirely based around Round Face. He hadn’t even done anything other than be dragged around and toyed with! 

Katsuki fancied himself as someone destined for greatness, but honestly, if that day was anything to go by, he was just destined for mediocrity. Getting caught up with a witch once in your life, not contributing to the situation, and then telling the story as though it were something to be proud of? That seemed like something that would happen to an oldest child.

It wasn’t fucking fair. It wasn’t  _ his  _ fault that Round Face intervened with his life. One bad encounter couldn’t possibly dictate the rest of his fate. This wasn’t a sign that he had the luck of an oldest child. All it showed was that Round Face should have minded her own business! What right did she have to stop Katsuki from showing two assholes what he was made of?

Why would she think that he couldn’t beat them?

By the time he got to the shop, Katsuki had worked himself into enough of a rage that he slammed the door closed behind him with enough force to shake the hats resting on their stands. The bell on the door jingled accusingly. He locked the door behind him with a bit too much gusto, and turned to face the shop. The hats seemed to stare at him.

“THE FUCK DO YOU WANT?!” he yelled at them. “IT’S NOT MY FAULT THAT ENDED SO BADLY! WHAT MORE DO YOU FUCKING WANT FROM ME?!” 

Katsuki’s mom not telling him to shut up meant his parents were out. Of course they were. Katsuki stormed to the back room of the shop, where his half-finished hats were, and decided to make a new one if he couldn’t scream this out at someone. He needed something to pour his energy into.

Admittedly, the hat he made was too bold. It was a monstrosity of black feathers and red rose petals, like drops of blood in the night, big and obvious. In the making of said unsellable hat, he’d stabbed himself,  _ hard _ , with a needle at least three times. By the time he was half finished, Katsuki was even angrier than he had been before he started. 

Suddenly, he heard that damn bell on the door jingle. “Hello~!” A voice called out. It sounded like it belonged to a young lady, which wasn’t too surprising, since that was the majority of the hat shop’s clientele. What was surprising was that she would be bold enough to barge into the shop when it was obviously closed. 

Katsuki sighed to himself. He was not ready to deal with someone who was either so stupid not to notice she wasn’t welcome or so fullhardy not to care.

Katsuki stomped to the main shoproom, where he was greeted by a blonde girl around his age. She had her hair in two buns on either side of her head, and a smile that looked a touch too wide for her face, showing unusually sharp teeth.

“Finally!” Smiley said, bounding over to him, a pronounced bounce to her step. “It took you sooooo long to get here! I’d like to buy a hat!”

“We’re closed,” Katsuki said, trying his hardest to keep his voice calm. She was annoying, but his mom wouldn’t want him to scare off a future customer.

“But I’m here now, and I want a hat!” Smiley said with a frown. “It’s very rude to send me away. And you can’t afford to be rude with hats that are this… unique.”

In that moment, Katsuki decided that he didn’t care what his mom would want. “What the FUCK is WRONG WITH MY HATS?!” Katsuki shouted. 

Smiley took a red hat that Katsuki made a while ago off of its stand. “There is nothing cute about these hats at all!” she said, shooting Katsuki a pout. 

“The FUCK DID YOU JUST SAY ABOUT MY HATS?!” Katsuki roared.

Smiley picked up at red red hat with gold lining and a rather attractive golden-silk flower on it, and looked at it closely. “This one makes for interesting conversation.” She made her way to the back of the shoproom and picked up another, this one tan with a pale pink bow. “This one intelligence.” The next was all black, except for a cluster of wax raspberries on the side. “This doesn’t do anything for anyone! And absolutely none of them are cute!”

Katsuki ground his teeth. “IF YOU THINK MY HATS ARE SO UGLY, THEN JUST LEAVE!”

Smiley scowled at him, and something about the expression was dark. Far darker than the scowl that Katsuki shot back at her. “You aren’t cute either. Not cute at all.”

“WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY ABOUT ME?!” Katsuki roared, ignoring the fear rising within him.

Instead of a response, Smiley charged at him. Katsuki had no proper training in combat, but he had sparred with Tsuyu enough times to know that this was a fight, and widen his stance on instinct, preparing for impact. Somehow, rather than crashing into him, the girl  _ went through  _ him. A chill settled over Katsuki, and he suddenly felt so weak. “That’s what you get for yelling at the Witch of the Waste!” she cooed. Wait. Smiley was the  _ Witch of the Waste _ ?! “You’re so much cuter now! And don’t bother trying to tell anyone about the curse. It won’t work.” With that, she left, the little bell on the door jingling cheerfully behind her.

Katsuki took a deep breath. It rattled unpleasantly in his lungs, and he coughed. As he moved his fist up to stifle it, he saw his hand.

Katsuki stared at it in disbelief. It was all wrinkled, with large blue veins showing under paper-thin skin, and knuckles like nobs. He slowly reached up to feel his face. He felt soft, leathery wrinkles. That wasn’t right. That couldn’t be right. He clawed, trying to peel them away, but all it did was hurt.

Katsuki tried to run to the mirror in the shop, but that only made him cough again, so he waited until it died down to  _ walk quickly  _ over.

In the mirror was a ninty year old man, with faint red claw marks down his cheeks.

“WHAT THE FUCK?!” Katsuki roared. He moved his hand, and so did the old man. He leaned forward, and the old man did, too. “Oh fuck,” Katsuki said, the old man’s lips moving with his own. Because he was the old man. 

_ He was the old man. _

Katsuki reared his fist back and punched the mirror. Rather than the mirror shattering, an intense pain shot through his arm. 

“Fucking shit! God damn, fuck!” he yelped, clutching his arm to his chest and waiting out the waves of pain. When the pain receded a bit, Katsuki flexed his fingers some. The pain didn’t intensify -- no broken bones. The fact that he had to worry about broken bones only made him angrier. He did  _ not  _ want to spend his life frail and afraid of breaking himself!

However much of his life he had left, that is.

Pure, burning hatred for the Witch of the Waste overcame him. Katsuki couldn’t believe this. He was supposed to join the army in under a year! How was he supposed to join a militia if he couldn’t throw a punch?

Then it hit him. Katsuki’s parents said that he couldn’t go off to seek his fortune until he was eighteen years old. Katsuki looked in the mirror. The face that looked back at him was far older than eighteen. 

In a weird way, he was free.

That didn’t make him any less angry about the situation. 

Katsuki knew what he  _ should _ do. What he would advise anyone else in his situation to do. He  _ should _ accept that he was far too old for it to be sensible to go off on his own, and live out the rest of his life in quiet peace. 

However, Katsuki found no appeal in the thought of peace, and sensibility was for everyone else in the world to worry about. There was no way that Katsuki was going to roll over and die like he should. He may not be in good enough condition to join the army, but he was certain that he was in good enough condition to leave Market Chipping for good.

Katuski hurried to the kitchen. Well, perhaps  _ hurried  _ is somewhat of an overstatement. It was difficult to hurry when he could do little more than hobble, but he certainly hobbled with all his might.

He made quick work of packing up some bread and cheese, and was ready to leave. As an afterthought, he grabbed his mother’s shawl from the coat hanger near the door. 

Katsuki wasn’t entirely sure what he was going to do as he hobbled through the town. He was certain that, if there was anywhere worth going, it was beyond the Waste, so he decided to figure out his next step when he got there.

Not to mention, if going to the Waste allowed him another meeting with the Witch that had done this to him, he would be glad of the chance to teach her a lesson.

So, Katsuki walked. He walked out, past all of the shops, past the twisting backways of Market Chipping, past everything that he had ever known. Past his life. 

Katsuki did not want to be sad to leave. He had wanted to escape from this place his whole life, so he couldn’t be sad now that he was doing just that. 

He kept telling himself that.

Somewhere, in the back of his head, Katsuki had expected there to be a line that he crossed, a hard difference between Market Chipping and the Waste. He expected it to feel different, to feel big. He expected there to be a palpable moment of leaving his old life behind. But that’s never how these things work. The houses just became less and less dense, until the distance between them was great enough that it was hard to see the nearest house at all. 

Before Katsuki knew it, the houses puttered out, and he was in the Waste.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, you all were so nice on the last chapter, I just couldn't believe it! I hope that you liked this one, too!  
> See you next time, with a castle!


	3. In Which Bakugou Invades a Castle

Between the mud, uneven terrain, and thick foliage of the Waste, it took Katsuki roughly five minutes to realize that his knees were not strong enough for this sort of journey. It took him twenty more minutes for his legs to buckle dangerously enough to make Katsuki give in to the inevitable: he was going to need a cane.

He took in his surroundings. He was knee-deep in tall grass that stretched as far as the eye could see, with nothing but the occasional bush dotting the horizon. Behind him was the option of walking back to the town to  _ buy _ a cane, but he was already giving in to his body; he could not bring himself to give in any further. 

He spotted a bush that had quite a promising branch protruding out the top of it, and hobbled determinately towards it.

“You better have something USEFUL!” he screamed as he approached the bush, leveling it with a glare. The bush seemed rather unaffected.

Katsuki huffed and stopped in front of the bush, sizing it up. It came up to about his chest, and the branch seemed sturdy. A grin split his face.

Katsuki gripped the branch with both of his hands and pulled. The bush gave an indignant rustle, not relinquishing the branch.

“COME ON!” Katsuki protested. He tugged again, to no avail. “MOVE, you piece of shit!” He placed both of his hands on top of the stick and pushed with his weight. The smaller branches of the bush groaned in protest. Katsuki pushed hard enough that his feet left the ground, and all at once the bush’s branches snapped and the stick came loose. Katsuki fell flat on his behind.

Only, the stick didn’t fall with him. He looked up to see a scarecrow, sporting a poorly-painted turnip as its head, and standing all on its own.

“DON’T TELL ME YOU’RE MAGIC,” Katsuki shouted at it. The scarecrow shook itself and hopped in a circle around him. “Great,” Katsuki grossed. “My cane was a  _ fucking Turniphead. _ ” Turniphead stopped jumping and looked at Katsuki, who was still sitting on the ground. At least, it seemed to be looking at Katsuki; it was hard to tell what those painted red eyes were doing. 

Katsuki huffed and picked himself up (with much pain and many creaking joints). “I don’t know what  _ you’re  _ staring at.  _ I’m  _ not the freak here.” Turniphead didn’t stop staring at him. “And you stopped me from getting a cane, so you are already on thin fucking ice _.  _ Get moving before I decide to take you apart for your branch.”

Turniphead shook itself again, and hopped off into the Waste at a speed that Katsuki couldn’t help but envy.

Katsuki sighed deeply, and inspected himself. He was covered in mud from his fall, every joint in his body protested that he was standing again, and still had no cane to speak of. So clearly it was time to try his luck with the next bush.

Katsuki was around halfway to the next bush (he would have made it the whole way if he  _ just had a cane  _ thank you very much), when he heard a familiar hopping from behind him. He turned to see Turniphead on the horizon, hopping towards him. 

Katsuki sighed harshly. He was in no mood to play babysitter to some cursed freak of nature. He was preparing to shout just that when he noticed something dangling from one of Turniphead’s arms. Something that was particularly cane-shaped.

Turniphead stopped in front of Katsuki, and the cane dropped from its arm, sinking neatly into the mud, just enough for it to stay upright. The cane was rather plain, nothing of note decorating it. Even so, Katsuki was filled with relief at the sight of it.

He glanced up at Turniphead. He still didn’t want to play babysitter.

Grasping the cane forcefully, he pointed its muddy end up at Turniphead accusingly. “You think that a cane is enough to get you in my good graces?” he growled. “Not a chance. I’m old and I’m tired and I know that I’ll have nowhere to rest tonight, so I don’t want you dragging me down even farther. Get lost.”

Turniphead made two small hops towards Katsuki, in what might have been an attempt to be endearing. 

“You won’t change my mind,” Katsuki snapped. 

Turniphead quickly swiveled around and hopped off, deeper into the Waste. Katsuki looked down at his new walking stick.

“That thing is going to come back, isn’t it?” Katsuki grossed. 

The cane did not respond.

Katsuki decided to keep walking. He walked until the warmth of the day fully faded into the night, and he shivered something fierce. He wrapped his shawl tighter around himself. “Isn’t it supposed to be May?” Katsuki snapped at the entirety of the Waste. “Why the fuck is it SO COLD THEN?!” 

It occurred to him that perhaps it wasn’t actually cold, but rather that he had developed a tendency to get cold easily in his old age. “FUCK!” he shouted, the sound echoing through the Waste. The wind picked up, and Katsuki shivered even though it was May, and he was old and in pain and thoroughly miserable.

It was at this moment that he heard something creaking and groaning in the distance. A puff and a whistle, like steam from a train. Katsuki whipped towards the sound. 

Over the crest of a hill hobbled that mismatched excuse for a castle. It was uglier than ever from up close. From the hat shop, it had been impossible to tell the scale of the thing. Now that it was right in front of him, Katsuki finally understood why people called it a castle: it was too big to be accurately described as anything else. And it was headed straight for Katsuki.

Hopping along in front of the castle, looking all too pleased with itself, was Turniphead. 

Katsuki wondered if he should run, but he was fairly certain that Turniphead would just lead the castle towards him if he did. Getting crushed by a castle was not how Katsuki thought he would die, and he was frankly displeased with this development.

“What I said earlier WAS NOT A REQUEST FOR YOU TO FIND ME SOMEWHERE TO STAY THE NIGHT!” Katsuki shouted, as Turniphead sideled up beside him. 

Katsuki braced for impact, but the castle started to slow down, until it finally stopped in front of him. It bent its odd chicken legs, leaning forwards, until the steps to what Katsuki assumed was the front door gently grazed the grass in front of him. That still put the lowest step at about Katsuki’s waist. 

Eyeing the steps skeptically, Katsuki wondered how he was even supposed to get up there. He wasn’t even sure that he should. Still, it bore further investigation. He made his way over to the castle, and leaned his cane against the steps.

At the touch, the castle lurched forwards, into Katsuki. Quite suddenly, his upper half was draped across the steps, and he was being lifted up as the castle’s legs straightened. His cane fell into the mud, and Katsuki grasped desperately at the railings on either side of him, as the castle began to move forward.

From far away, it was hard to appreciate just how fast the castle moved. When dangling precariously from it, it became clear that it moved quite fast indeed.

Katsuki’s knuckles were white from his grip on the railing, and his legs flailed in midair, trying to find some sort of purchase. Finally, his foot hit something. It was thin, and moved too much, there less often than it wasn’t, but there was a rhythm to it. Katsuki felt out the timing, and it took him four tries, but he finally got in a good enough purchase to get his knee up on the step. From there, he pulled the rest of himself up. 

He sat on the steps for a moment, heart beating wildly. Then, he noticed Turniphead’s stupid turnip head popping up in front of Katsuki to the same rhythm as the foothold.

Ah. That made sense.

“I could have done it MYSELF, you know,” Katsuki yelled. Turniphead just kept hopping. “What, are you gonna follow me forever?”

Turniphead jumped a bit higher and banged its arm against the railing pointedly. Dangling from the arm was the cane. “If I take the cane, will you leave me alone?” Katsuki asked. Turniphead just banged its arm on the side again. Katsuki sighed deeply. “Fine.” He snagged the cane when it came back into snagging distance. Turniphead fell below Katsuki’s line of sight once more. This time, Turniphead did not reappear.

Cane in hand, Katsuki clambered slowly to his feet. He shivered, and went to adjust his shawl, only to find it was no longer there. “Great,” he snapped. “Just perfect.” He made his way up the steps and opened the door.

The first thing Katsuki noticed about the castle was that it was wonderfully warm. That was enough to make him rush inside, shutting the door firmly behind him. The next thing he noticed was that he could not feel the terrible rocking and shaking from within the castle. And then he turned from the door, and noticed was how horrendously cluttered the place was.

But Katsuki couldn’t bring himself to care about that just yet, because there was a fireplace in the middle of the room. 

Katsuki grabbed a comfortable looking chair that was piled high with what looked like multiple journals and topped off with a sketchbook open to a complex rune. He pushed everything on it onto the floor, and pulled the chair over to the fire. Finally, he sunk down into it, half his joints cracking on the way down. It was a far cry better than the Waste. The fire warmed him up, and the chair supported his back, and at this point, if anyone tried to get him to leave, he wished them good fucking luck.

The only problem was that the fire was burning awfully low. Katsuki looked around for some extra wood, and found a stack conveniently near the hearth. He was annoyed to have to get up again so soon, but it was better than the fire going out on him. He creaked his way to standing, and threw a few logs onto the fire. Then, he sat firmly back into his chair and resolved himself not to move again until absolutely necessary. He held his cold hands out to the fire.

Comfortable at last, Katsuki was content enough to take a look around. The room he was in wasn’t dirty, per se, but no matter where Katsuki looked, there were piles of clutter. To one direction were books, piled on top of and around the too-small bookcase, to another bottles upon bottles of dried herbs and half-finished concoctions crowded a small table, and no matter where he looked, papers and loose pages and empty bottles were scattered about the floor. 

Katsuki snorted slightly. “What a dump,” he said.

“It was much worse before Iida moved in,” a voice said. And Katsuki couldn’t help but stare, because two big, green eyes stared out at him from the fire. The fire flickered at him, and the eyes blinked. There were little green embers shifting beneath them that could be freckles, and a thin line that could be a mouth. And probably was a mouth. Because the fire just spoke.

Katsuki blinked a few times. “What the fuck,” he said. A reasonable reaction for when a fire begins to talk. “Don't tell me  _ you're  _ Uraraka.”

“Oh, no. No, that’s not me. I'm no witch. And my name is Deku.”

“ _ Deku? _ As in useless?”

“Um, Uraraka meant it, like, you can do it!”

“Sure she did,  _ Deku. _ ” Katsuki though for a moment. “If you’re not a witch, then what are you?”

“A fire demon.”

That gave Katsuki a thought. “Demons are dark magic, yeah?”

Deku sunk lower in his grate. “We are.”

Dark magic. His curse was probably dark magic. It therefore stood to reason that a creature of dark magic could break it. “Then--” Katsuki’s throat closed up on him. He tried to power through, but no matter how hard he tried to choke out the words, they wouldn’t come out right. He slammed his fist down on the hearth with an annoyed growl. 

Deku flinched back. “That  _ is  _ a nasty curse,” he said, sympathetically. “That's what's stopping you from talking, right?” 

Katsuki glared at him. “Don’t asks questions you already know the answers to,  _ Deku. _ ”

“I can try to break it, if you want.” At that, Katsuki perked up. “But, like I said, it’s nasty. I would need to study it.” He seemed to scoot closer to the grate. “It seems like it has two layers to it, too. Do you know who cast it?” Katsuki tried to answer, but it didn’t work. “Right, right, naturally you couldn’t say, but whoever it was was a genius. I’d say-”

“How long will it take?” Katsuki grit out. This demon was already too annoying to bear.

Deku shrunk back a bit. “A while, I’m afraid.” Then he perked up, sending some embers into the chimney. “Demons are stronger under contract! How about a bargain? You break my contract with Uraraka, and I break your curse.”

Katsuki scowled. “Like hell I’m going to make a deal with a demon.” Katsuki looked around himself again. Now, instead of seeing clutter, he saw potential. He saw piles upon piles of spellbooks. “I’ll find my own way to break the curse,” Katsuki decided. 

“If you’re sure,” Deku muttered. He seemed rather put out by the decision. 

“Of course I’m sure,” Katsuki said, a smirk stretching across his face. 

All at once, he realized how tired he was. He had not gotten a lick of sleep since he was a young man, afterall. He yawned widely, and sent Deku a glare. “Wake me up, and there will be a bucket of water in your face.”

Deku shrunk back into the fireplace again, and Katsuki smiled to himself. He leaned back in the chair, and went to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there! Thank you so much for reading, and I'm sorry for the long wait! I have three excuses: 1. College kicked my ass. 2. Writers block. 3. The very nature of this story changed in my head from a single fic to three fics, so I had to plan the other two and then change some things in my outline for this one to set up better for the next two. 
> 
> So, yeah! Thank you for reading, comments and kudos give me life, and I am really sorry that it took so long! I would promise not to do it again, but..... I cannot promise that.
> 
> See you next time, with a witch!

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! This fic has been in my head for over a month now, and I decided it was time to bring it out! At the moment, it should end up as 15 chapters, but who can actually say with these things, right? I am sooooo excited for the rest of it, and hope you are too!  
> A lot of this is based off of this picture I drew for my sister! http://trekkie-supreme-overlord.tumblr.com/image/178091188544  
> Kudos and comments are my lifeblood, so if you wanna scream at me, feel free!  
> See you next time, with a curse!


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